Why I Created Kissing School


It was late 1997, and I was sitting at a crossroads. I could feel that an expansion of some sort was in the works for my two-decade holistic therapy practice. You know those times, every long while, when the threads of your life weave themselves into a new tapestry…

One loose thread was that I was keenly aware that so many of the couples I’d worked with over the years had so very few tools for cultivating intimacy. Our society has such a small awareness of the deep, rich, fertile ground that well-engaged hearts share. It’s almost impossible to experience something you don’t know exists. We’re not so open that new possibilities can readily fall in. So I asked myself, what was something I could teach them that would open them to experiences of luscious communion?

Another thread was a proposal I’d been working on for teaching Human Sexuality at the Naturopath College. I’d taught there before and I knew the students were up to their eyeballs with school and life. How could I offer something experiential that they could actually experience, instead of more of the mental bits of information they were so diligently filing away. Given the topic, how would this be possible in this setting?

Within the same time frame that I was pondering all this I began dating someone in his mid-fifties who did NOT know how to kiss. This boggled my mind, how can someone get to their mid-fifties and NOT know how to kiss?

Early on I shared with him how important kissing is to me, the connection, the nuance, the sweet heat, the swoon…the communication of heart and soul. Either he needed to let me teach him how to kiss, or we couldn’t go any further.

To my delight he sat straight up and asked, “That means that we’d have a lot of homework, right?” Right!

As I paused and assessed how to begin, it was clear that first he needed to know about experiencing the energies of passion and spirit thru his body. He had to get into his body. We needed to begin with the essence of Tantra, energy mastery, and weave it into our kiss.

I opened myself up to what needed to be said, and out came lifetimes of wisdom and rich, palpable passion. We began with awareness, engagement and energy mastery, and our lessons on technique became infused with presence, heartfulness, passion and communion. Swoons were shared.

He was my first student, the lessons were very successful, and just in time. Soon after his transformation as a lover he suddenly passed away, apparently ready to go. From my experiences with this sweet soul the practices of Kissing School were woven.

Spirit always brings us what we need if we are willing to receive. This tapestry of intimacy skills was precisely the skill set and permission slips I needed for my clients, and the doctors and therapists, and ALL. Kissing School is dedicated to everyone who feels that experiencing an expanded sense of wholeness and sharing this with one’s beloved is the best part of life, especially when delivered with the kiss sublime…


Kissing School has been written about, filmed and viewed all around the globe. Blessed be the lovers of LOVING, I’ve so enjoyed watching you blossom.